THE WORST LIGHT SHOW EVER!

 

Episode Title:  The Lights of Zetar

Air Date: 1/31/1969

Written by Jeremy Tarcher and Shari Lewis

Directed by Herb Kenwith

Cast: William Shatner as Captain James T. Kirk    Leonard Nimoy as Commander Spock             DeForest Kelley as Dr. Leonard H. McCoy AKA “Bones”              James Doohan  as Lieutenant Commander Montgomery Scott AKA “Scotty”        George Takei  as Lieutenant  Hikaru Sulu              Nichelle Nichols as Lieutenant Nyota Uhura          John Winston as  Lieutenant Kyle            Bill Blackburn as Lieutenant Hadley        Jan Shutan as Lieutenant Mira Romaine         Roger Holloway as Lt. Lemli                        Majel Barrett as Nurse Christine Chapel          Walter Koenig as Ensign Pavel Chekov      Frank Da Vinci as unnamed Crewman                Jeannie Malone as unnamed Yeoman       Libby Erwin as unnamed Crewman      Barbara Babcock as voice of Zetar              

Ships: USS Enterprise NCC-1701

Planets:  Memory Alpha

My Spoiler filled summary and review: The episode opens with Kirk being very concerned about his Chief Engineer.  Mr. Scott is in love with the new officer Lt. Mira Romaine.  Considering that last time Mr. Scott fell in love it brought the wrath of a god upon them, Kirk has his reasons to be concerned.

Scotty's love life rarely leads to good things

They are bringing Lt. Romaine to Memory Alpha to do some work there.  Memory Alpha is the center for all the cataloged knowledge of the entire United Federation of Planets.  Then something strange happens.  This bizarre entity in space that emits random colors shows up and seemly attacks the Enterprise.  The ship’s shields protect them from the main part of the blast but bright rainbow lights flutter the ship like a strobe light.  Kirk finds himself unable to speak.  It is later discovered that each member of the crew lost some function, but not all the same indicting an attack on different areas of the brain.  Romaine gets hit the hardest and when they go to help her, she starts speaking with an odd voice.  It's total nonsense and she seems like a person possessed.  She recovers and is sent to sick bay for observation.

Sulu discovers that the entity that they encountered is now heading directly toward Memory Alpha.  The facility on that planetoid does not have shields because it was determined that its scientific and peaceful mission would be open to all so defensive measures wouldn’t be necessary.  (I have some ideas about that in my “additional thoughts” section.)  While hanging out with Scotty, Lt. Romaine has a vision that the Chief Engineer explains away as common space sickness.  In the vison she sees people dying.

"I think I am alright not quite sure."

When the Enterprise gets to Memory Alpha, the landing party discovers that nearly all the occupants are dead, the memory banks had been damaged, and the one survivor was talking in a way similar to Lt. Romaine.  They bring Romaine down to the station and she freaks out when she sees the bodies are all positioned just like in her vison.  

A bad day for the cause of science

The energy light show returns and chases the Enterprise around the system.  Kirk attempts to communicate with it but has no luck.  The thing leaves the Captain no choice to but to defend the ship so he has Mr. Sulu fire phasers.  This works at getting the entity to back off but at the same time Lt. Romaine screams in pain.  Scotty calls the bridge to inform them of the situation.

She doesn't survive

    

They have a meeting to figure out what to do about the situation.  McCoy has discovered the Romaine’s brainwave pattern has been altered to match the entity outside. It appears to be trying to make a new home out of the Lieutenant.  Romaine is also concerned that she has seen images of Mr. Scott dying.  They brainstorm that the entity is so use to be non-corporal that if it enters her body, they may be able to force it out with a compression chamber.

Coming for Romaine

The entity is able to get through and enters the body of the Lieutenant.  Speaking with an augmented voice the possessed Romaine explains that the light entity is actually a collective.  They are from the planet Zetar, a world that had died.  The last hundred survivors were able to transform their consciousnesses into a disembodied form.  They have been searching the universe for a host that can receive their consciousnesses so they can live out their lives.  Kirk insists that Romaine’s life is her own and when they don’t release her the four men stick in the compression chamber.  This works the Zetars can’t take it and they flea the body and the Enterprise.  In the end Lt. Romaine is judged healthy enough to begin the repairs at Memory Alpha.  

Additional thoughts: Poor Scotty every time he falls in love some great power in the universe tries to show up and take her away.  First it was Apollo the God of the Sun, and now it is a great job on Memory Alpha.  Also, the annoying Zetars.  In the end the day Scotty’s on true love is the Enterprise and no woman will change that. 

When Romaine first got zapped it made me wonder what would happen if they had brought her to the edge of the galaxy.  However, the episode does make it clear that she had no prior ESP ability. I wonder if that would change now?

The Zetars are not the first disembodied-aliens-looking-for-some-bodies that the Enterprise has encountered. It is however the first time they decided not to even attempt to help them. When talking to them through Romaine you think Kirk would at least suggest that they could work together to find some solution.  Heck maybe the androids on planet Mudd might be willing to help. But no, its “that is her body you get out of it. You had your time but dead aliens need to stay dead.”  To be fair when they did lend their own bodies out to disembodied aliens in the past it didn’t go well.  So maybe Captain Kirk is just operating on his own experience.

I don’t know how I feel about the ending.  On one hand its to simple for me.  They have a quick meeting, discuss what they are going to do, and then do it.  No problems, no set backs and no drama.  However, since it is an ongoing series where we see greater struggles in other episodes, it is nice to show how capable the crew is with a quick brainstorm and an easy win.   

Just lie down and let the machine do the work!

Now to Memory Alpha. Okay for a place that is supposed to house all the knowledge of all worlds of the Federation, who hired some turd-brain to design its defenses.  Despite it the facility’s having no military objective or use there are still all kinds of natural disasters where shields are very useful.  I mean in a universe where doomsday machines drop by, nomads go loose on multiple planetary systems, giant cells dropping down from heavy galaxies, cloud vampires move from planet to planet, or a random asteroid knocked off course by a passing starship.  There are many nonaggressive reasons to get yourselves some shields.  Hopefully the new staff at Memory Alpha will figure that out.

FINAL GRADE 3 of 5

I WILL DO ANYTHING FOR PRIVACY, BUT I WON’T DO THAT

Episode Title:  The Mark of Gideon

Air Date: 1/17/1969

Written by George F. Slavin and Stanley Adams

Directed by Jud Taylor

Cast: William Shatner as Captain James T. Kirk    Leonard Nimoy as Commander Spock             DeForest Kelley as Dr. Leonard H. McCoy AKA “Bones”              James Doohan  as Lieutenant Commander Montgomery Scott AKA “Scotty”        George Takei  as Lieutenant  Hikaru Sulu              Nichelle Nichols as Lieutenant Nyota Uhura          Frank da Vinci as Lieutenant Brent     Walter Koenig as Ensign Pavel Chekov                 Richard Derr as Admiral Fitzgerald          Sharon Acker as Odona         David Hurst as Hodin         Gene Dynarski as Krodak         Bill Blackburn as Gideon Inhabitant     Jay D. Jones as Gideon Guard

Ships: USS Enterprise NCC-1701

Planets:  Gideon

My Spoiler filled summary and review: The episode begins with the Enterprise settling into orbit around Gideon.  The planet is looking to join the Federation but it nevertheless has some odd ball requests to make.  First, they don’t want to much contamination of their planet’s culture so they will permit only one representative.  Second, that representative must be Captain Kirk.  

Kirk is talking things over with Spock who will handle the transporter controls personally.  Kirk beams down only to rematerialize in the transporter room.  However, Spock is missing!  He looks for Spock but cannot find him or anyone for that matter.  The entire crew has disappeared and Kirk is the only one on the ship!

Or has the crew disappeared?  For we the audience see the crew of the Enterprise still on the Enterprise.  They are wondering where Captain Kirk had disappeared to because he isn’t reporting from where he was meant to be.  They contract the Gideon High Council and they claim that they have no idea where Kirk is.  They don’t however want anyone searching for him.  That would invite contamination on their poor planet.  Spock has Sulu search space slowly. 

Some times negotiations don't go well!

As Kirk wonders around the empty starship, he finds a young woman.  She demands to know why he brought her here.  She thinks the Enterprise is wonderful for having so much space.  Kirk doesn’t really know what to make of this woman at first.  Her name is Odona but she doesn’t remember where she is from.  The audience can clearly see that she is this episode’s love interest.

Girlfriend of the week!

Spock has Uhura try both Starfleet and the Federation bureaucracy itself, and all they get is the run around.  Each department tries to point the Enterprise crew to each other in an attempt to resolve the issue.  Spock, the son of a diplomat, has a funny response to the usefulness of both diplomats and bureaucrats.

Uhura is not having much luck!

Odona still insists she has no idea where she is from.  Kirk tries to tell her she is from Gideon.  He tries to show her that they are in orbit around the planet.  However, when they get to the bridge, they discover that the ship is no longer in orbit.  Instead, they are in warp drive toward deep space.  Kirk manages to get the ship out of warp and he was surprised when they didn’t feel any different.  The screen shows the ship is stopped however.  Odona confides to Captain Kirk that where she comes from the planet is over populated.  There is nowhere anyone can go to that is already crowded with people.  Privacy is a desire that many of her people would kill for.  As Kirk comforts her the stars on the view screen change to faces of people, but the hugging couple don’t see this.

These aren't stars!

Spock once again tries to get the Gideon High Council to allow them to go down and form a search.  As the two bicker back and forth the Council finally agrees to allow the Enterprise to test their transporter by beaming one of the Council members to the ship.  They give their coordinates and Spock has one of the council members beam aboard.  They send him back but notice the coordinates that they gave for the Council Chamber were different for Captain Kirk.

And Kirk thought the monster on the airplane was bad!

As Kirk and Odona wonder the halls all of the sudden they hear a strange noise.  It sounds like something outside the ship.  That should be impossible seeing as they are in space.  They go to a view port where they have a window to the literal outside.  When Kirk opens the port, he is greeted with a room full of creepy people staring at the two of them. Then they are gone and there are stars again.  Kirk turns to Odona for an explanation but she seems to be just as confused.  Then she seems ill and collapses.

Kirk then brings her to sickbay he has a strong suspicion that she has Vegan choriomeningitis a condition that he once had that can be fatal but it is easily treated.  However, Kirk is interrupted on his way to sickbay when Ambassador Hodin appears.  He claims that he is Odona’s father and they brought him her so her could infect her and allow her to die.

Spock to the rescue!

Back on the Enterprise, Spock is in communication with Admiral Fitzgerald at Starfleet Command.  The Admiral makes it clear that even through the Gideons in their request are beyond weird, they are to take no further action.  The Admiral thinks Spock will just forget about Captain Kirk so he probably doesn’t remember what happened in “Amok Time.”

 Back on the planet and its fake Enterprise, Kirk and Hodin are arguing about the situation and the fate of Odona. Hodin explains their population problem and rejects any common-sense approach to the problem that Captain Kirk offers.  (I have more to say about this in my additional thoughts section.) The only way, according to Hodin, is to have a young person die of a curable disease so that those on Gideon can see that it is possible for young people to die. This is a very bad plan but it does show us that the Gideons are not the greatest of thinkers.

Kirk clearly annoyed at having argue with idiots!

Spock decides to disobey the Admiral’s order and head down to Gideon anyway.  McCoy wants to go with him but Spock, forgetting the lessons that he learned in “Amok Time” but also the ones from the second part of “The Menagerie,” Spock tells the Doctor that he will go alone.  Spock sends himself down to the same coordinates as Captain Kirk, and like Kirk ends up in the fake transporter room. After making a log entry, Spock completes his search of the ship and finds Kirk, Hodin, and Odona in sickbay.  Spock contacts the ship and the two Starfleet officers take Odona with them.  On the ship she is treated and cured of her condition. However, since she had been infected with Vegan choriomeningitis her blood can be used to infect others so she goes back to her insane planet. 

All cured and ready to infect others!

Additional thoughts: This story has two really interesting ideas.  The first is the Captain stepping into the transporter and when he steps out his entire crew is missing.  The second is a planet where both disease and war have disappeared but they now have an extreme population control problem.  Either story would be worth exploring, but they try to do both and as a result do justice to neither.  I don’t think that this episode is bad but it is just okay.  It could have been much better.

                Try as I might I can’t feel sorry for the Gideons.  This premise might have worked better if they were a pre-warp species that our crew were exploring and having ended war and disease were in danger of being wiped out as their oversized population consumed all their resources.  Too many people yet headed for extinction would have made for a fascinating episode.  Instead, we have a planet Gideon whose people are the source of all their own problems.

                You could almost say this episode is supposed to be a warning about the dangers of extreme pro-life anti-abortion politics and almost could have been if it had been executed well, but it isn’t.  When discussing the problem with Captain Kirk the first thing Kirk suggests is sterilization, Hodin points out that this won’t work their bodies will just repair the damaged part.  After that Kirk suggests that there are alternative as contraception methods.  This is when Hodin revels their truth, they can’t use such methods because that would interfere with their cultural beliefs.  All life is to be valued from fetus to old person.  Since they have no privacy that has ceased to be a cultural requirement for sex, and with their love of life they can’t stop fornicating.  They refuse to take preventive measures or give women access to abortion.  You can almost hear Meat Loaf sing “I would do anything for some privacy but I won’t do that, and that, and that thing too!"  Who can feel sorry for these people? 

It gets worse they make contact with the Federation and instead of saying “hey can we’re over populated could you help us find some planets to relocate a great deal of our population?”  No, instead they hide their planet like a hoarder hides their house and try to kidnap the Captain.  Why do they do this?  Because they think if they can reintroduce this disease, they can convince enough people to agree to commit suicide by voluntarily infecting themselves with it, that their planet will return to a normal sized population.  For some reason they don’t see their “love of life” belief interfering with this as it has every other possible solution.  Now if they make Hodin and his council more like a Kodos the Executioner-type of characters then the episode could have been interesting.  In a desperate attempt to do something about the population problem with a society whose culture makes it impossible to democratically fix, they decide to introduce some foreign plague and virgin-soil epidemics will take route and drive their population down to manageable levels.  Seeing how the crew of the Enterprise would handle that would be an episode worth watching.  Instead, we have Kirk running around a fake empty Enterprise for a good deal of the episode.   

All by myself...

I do like that the Gideons found the space to build their very own underground duplicate interior of the Enterprise. However, I think this feat has been replicated by Star Trek fans in real life. I wonder what the crowed and self-centered Gideons thought when their government sealed off all that space?  Also how did the Gideons get the specs for the Enterprise to begin with?

One too many people

Gideon was applying to join the Federation but why would the Federation even want these people?  They want to join the Federation but won’t allow anyone to even see their planet?  The Federation should have taken that as a red flag right there.  They don’t even want you to see their planet then they are clearly people hoarders. 

Mr. Spock has seemed to have picked up on Captain Kirk’s habit of bizarrely timed log entries.  Spock beams down to a fake Enterprise and his first instinct is to make an entry into that ship’s log!?! I wondered what the Gideon’s make of it when they got to listen to it.  Were they proud that they were able to replicate the ship to impress even Mr. Spock?

There is one part of the episode I really did enjoy.  When negotiating with the High Council, Spock would turn to the crew for advice.  Yet, he didn't turn the sound off.  So every time Spock turned to the crew and they, especially Scotty, went on rant about how nasty they thought the High Council was the High Council heard the whole thing.  I got a good laugh out of that.  

One thing is sure he got to hear what the crew really thought of him!

In closing given his family history it may not be so surprising to see Spock lose faith in diplomats. "Diplomats and bureaucrats may function differently, but they achieve exactly the same results."

FINAL GRADE 3 of 5