KIRK AND CREW MEET KUKULKAN

 

Episode Title:  How Sharper Than a Serpent's Tooth

Air Date: 10/5/1974

Written by Russell Bates and David Wise

Directed by Bill Reed

Cast: William Shatner as Captain James T. Kirk    Leonard Nimoy as Commander Spock        DeForest Kelley as Dr. Leonard H. McCoy AKA “Bones”              James Doohan  as Lieutenant Commander Montgomery Scott AKA “Scotty”, Lieutenant Arex, Ensign Dawson Walking Bear, and Kukulkan                           Nichelle Nichols as Lieutenant Nyota Uhura         

Ships: USS Enterprise NCC-1701, Kukulkan’s ship

Planets: none

My Spoiler filled summary and review: The Enterprise is sent to investigate a mysterious space probe that appears to have come from outside the galaxy.  Considering the doomsday devices, nasty aliens, and single-cell life forms that have caused trouble when they entered the galaxy, you can understand the need to investigate.  

As they approach the probe another starship arrives.  This strange vessel gets even stranger as it approaches.  It suddenly transforms itself into a large feathered serpent with wings.  Ensign Walking Bear recognizes the image as Kukulkan.  Kirk askes the Ensign how he knows this and the officer, who is Comanche, explains that he has always been interested in all Native American theology throughout North and South America.  He recognizes Kukulkan as an ancient Mayan god.  Kukulkan communicates with the Enterprise stating that he is pleased that there is one amongst them that still remembers him.  However, he is very disappointed in the rest humanity.  He announces that they will be given another chance to prove themselves.

The Enterprise vs Kukulkan

An energy “bubble” surrounds the Enterprise holding the ship in place. As the bridge crew tries to figure out how to handle this, they suddenly lose important crew members. Kirk, McCoy, Scotty, and Walking Bear vanish without a trace.  Spock, being the ever resourceful first officer, assumes command of the ship.  Using his typical Vulcan logic, he concludes that their crewmates were taken by Kukulkan and there is nothing they can do about it, so he will focus all their energies into freeing the ship.

Strange city they find themselves in

The four officers find themselves inside the other ship.  They have no weapons but McCoy does have his med kit which is at least something.  Kirk asks Walking Bear what the legends say what happened to Kukulkan.  Walking Bear says he left with a promise to return one day.  Kirk then assumes that the probe was his.  This really was Kukulkan who visited Earth thousands of years ago and appeared to the locals to be a god. It’s not the first time something like that happened after all. 

Then all four are transported to what looks like a recreation of an ancient Mayan city.  Kukulkan lets them know that they are being tested and that there are clues in this city. Walking Bear explains that Kukulkan was the one who gave the Mayan people their calendar and that they were to build the city to its cycles. Kirk thinks that Kukulkan appeared to others but most didn’t build it right. That is why he never came back.  Kirk thinks the clue is at the temple so he climbs it and figures out the code. He has the others redirect the serpent shaped lights toward the temple.  When they finish Kukulkan appears and proclaims they have strayed from the path he set for them. Kirk attempts to argue but then they are transported again.

Ensign explains the alien god

Now in they are in a new room that is full various animals in tiny glass cages.  One of the creatures, McCoy notices, is a Capellan power cat that has the power to send out 2,000 volts of electricity with a single touch.   All four Starfleet officers object to the inhuman treatment of the animals.  At this point Kukulkan starts trying to justify himself. Which I think is odd because all this time Kukulkan’s main point has been “I am God and you my children have let me down,” and now he switches to “I am really not that bad.”  In his defense Kukulkan tells his prisoners sees themselves not in a cage but in their own natural environment. So, I suppose the four of them weren’t really in an ancient city after all.  They were just in a cage of glass and when they stepped out, they were ‘transported’ to this place.  (At least that is what I think happened.)

Solving the puzzle 

Kirk points out that if children are never allowed to grow up and become independent, they will never be anything but children.  Kirk declares that modern humans can never accept a master again.  This information is upsetting to the would-be god.  It is at this time that Spock, leading the rest of the Enterprise crew, find a way for the ship to break out of the energy bubble.  As the Enterprise broke free McCoy toyed with the cage of the Capellan power cat setting him loose.  This ends up breaking Kukulkan’s power.  He was relying on the cat’s energy to power his ship. Beaten Kukulkan retreats. 

Animals in cages

As the episode ends Kirk gives the old god credit for helping humanity at one time and thinks it’s sad, they couldn’t find a way to co-exist.  McCoy refers to the Shakespeare line "How sharper than a serpent's tooth it is to have a thankless child."  

No, I am a responsible pet owner!

Additional thoughts: If I remember correctly the Mayan calendar ran out in 2012.  I remember everyone thought the world was going to end the way it was supposed to on Y2K.  The world didn’t end either time and many people were disappointed. 

This episode reminded me of the classic Star Trek episode “Who Mourns for Adonais?” where the crew of the Enterprise runs into the Greek god Apollo.  It turns out that the ancient gods of Olympus were just a bunch of aliens passing through, who made a big impression on the primitive humans.  Well turns out the gods the Mayans worshipped had the same deal.  They were aliens who stopped by, did humanity a favor or two in return for being worshipped.  In both cases these alien/gods had a hard time understanding that humans have moved on from them, even though they are now meeting with them flying through space on a faster-than-light starship.  They demand to be worshipped as they were before and when they don’t get it, they freak out.

"Remember me? You're telling my story again!"

  It is a little too bad that in both cases they are not able to work out a new modern relationship with their former deities.  It would be interesting to develop a bond with a species we once thought were gods.  I imagine we would learn a lot.  The closest we ever came to this in the series is when Kirk saved Satan from some alien puritans.

That power cat!

Why was Ensign Walking Bear wearing a red uniform?  He is filling in for Sulu at the helm so why isn't he in command gold?  Maybe his transfer just happened and he has not yet received his gold uniform?  That's the only thing that makes sense to me. 

Super-charged

All those animals being kept in cages where they thought they were in their natural environments reminded me to “The Cage.”  Considering Kirk directly learned of those events in the second part of “The Menagerie” I think it is a small shame that he didn’t make a mention of it.  Although to be fair, I don’t think the Kukulkan would have cared.  

FINAL GRADE 5 of 5

KIRK MAYBE A JERK BUT HE IS STILL THE BANE OF ALL AI

 

Episode Title:  The Practical Joker

Air Date: 9/21/1974

Written by Chuck Menville

Directed by Bill Reed

Cast: William Shatner as Captain James T. Kirk    Leonard Nimoy as Commander Spock        DeForest Kelley as Dr. Leonard H. McCoy AKA “Bones”              James Doohan  as Lieutenant Commander Montgomery Scott AKA “Scotty”, Lieutenant Arex, unnamed Crewman                           George Takei as Lieutenant Hikaru Sulu                    Nichelle Nichols as Lieutenant Nyota Uhura          Majel Barrett as Lieutenant M’Ress and Enterprise computer        Norm Prescott as Romulan Commander              Lou Scheimer as Romulan Crewman

Ships: USS Enterprise NCC-1701, 3 unnamed D7-R class ships

Planets: none

My Spoiler filled summary and review: The Enterprise is doing a routine survey of some type-4 asteroids.  Just as they are about to complete their relatively boring task, they are ambushed by three Romulan D-7 cruisers.  Suddenly boredom doesn’t look so bad as they are chased across space by this act of unprovoked aggression.  (Or, maybe it was provoked I bet the Romulans haven’t gotten over Kirk stealing that cloaking device a few years back.) Kirk decides that since they are outnumbered three to one trying to out maneuver them and escape is their best bet.  It is at this point that the Enterprise’s sensors pick up a strange energy field.  Kirk decides that is their best bet and heads straight for it.  Not wanting to follow them in and possible surrender their advantage, the Romulans back off.

Ambush

Later as the ship’s senior officers are having a meal and discussing the day, they discover all their glasses have holes causing their drinks to spill over their shirts.  It reminds most of a Starfleet Academy prank but no one comes forward as the culprit.  As the mission goes on other “jokes” start plaguing the crew. Forks bend, Mr. Spock gets eyeliners applied when using a science monitor, the food synthesizers start making random things and one of them throws items at Scotty, and the final straw is when “Kirk is a jerk” is written on the back of Kirk’s uniform and one of the decks was frozen in ice.

The jokes are going to begin.

The crew begins to accuse each other of being the one responsible however Mr. Spock makes the accusation against one that no other even suspected.  Mr. Spock thinks the prankster is the ship itself and that is the laughter being heard over the intercoms is the voice of the ship’s main computer. He concludes that something akin a virus effected the ship’s main computer when they passed through that energy field.

At this point McCoy, Uhura, and Sulu decide to spend some time in the rec room.  The rec room is capable of simulating other environments.  They go over a few before settling on one, however their enjoyment is short-lived when the computer decides it would be fun to change the environment on them.  So instead of a nice day at the beach or a walk in the woods they are instead put into an artic climate, or as McCoy would say “he means it’s cold!” 

"He means it's cold!"

Scotty tries to free the ship’s crew from the main computer’s mercy by detaching its reasoning circuits.  However, while he is attempting to do that the computer cuts the ship’s gravity sending everyone to the roof of their decks.  Scotty wiggles away from the main computers hardware and the gravity turns back on giving everyone a hard fall to the floor.  They manage to free McCoy, Sulu, and Uhura from the misfunctioning rec room the old-fashioned way: with crowbars.

A bad day for Mr. Scott.

It was around this time that the Romulans stuck their Vulcan-looking heads back in.  However, the computer of the Enterprise decided it was time for some revenge. It constructs a balloon duplicate version of the Enterprise that has the ability to make itself appear as a regular ship to enemy sensors.  It is doing this realizing that the Romulans value honor above all else and once the Romulans discover that the ship they thought was the Enterprise was in fact a fake it will be humiliating for them. 

The Enterprise creating its own fake!

The Romulans are humiliated just as the computer intended and come gunning for revenge.  Captain Kirk, realizing that the half-hour show plus commercials is just about up and he is really tired of dealing with the self-aware starship, Kirk then uses some good old reverse psychology acting like he is scared to reenter the energy field.  The computer hears this and decides to fly straight at it.  Kirk now wins as going back through the energy field undid the changes and the Enterprise has a normal functioning computer again.  The poor Romulans however are not so lucky as they followed the Enterprise in, the crew of those ships now have some practical jokers of their own.  

Now its his turn to suffer

 

Additional thoughts: Well, this episode was a blast and probably the most fun Majel Barrett has since “What Are Little Girls Made Of?”  The show balanced the seriousness of a Romulan ambush with some comedy elements similar to “The Naked Time,” “I’Mudd,” and “The Trouble With Tribbles.” This episode also did not feel rushed due to its run time, unlike other episodes of this series where things seem to resolved to quickly after lots of  build up.

Poor Scotty!

I am going to break my rule about only commenting on Star Trek that existed when the reviewed episode came out.  It’s just for this small moment however.  I want to talk about the Rec Room/Holodeck.  This does appear to be the origin of the concept.  However there does seem to be one major key difference: the Rec Room does not appear to create characters just environments, where the later can create people who look and feel real.  Either way this is the first “holodeck breaks down and becomes dangerous” troupe episode.  My only real issue with this is McCoy, Uhura, and Sulu should be smarter than this.  Do you really think that during a time where the Enterprise computer has gone rogue you want to keep your Rec Room/holodeck appointment.  It seems to me like you are asking for trouble.

These three probably should have waited!

"Its cold!"

Once we knew the Enterprise had somehow gained a type of sentience it was only a matter of time before Kirk defeated it.  Captain Kirk has proven time and again he is the Bane of All Artificial Intelligence. No AI is a match for him especially one that was born less than an hour ago.  Heck if Kirk had fought Skynet then it never would have got off the ground, as Kirk would have just talked into sending a terminator back to kill its own creator instead of Sarah Conner.  I do wonder though was it an AI or a strange entity that lived in the energy field that simply hopped on board the Enterprise as it was passing though.  The reason I ask this is it took time for the computer to build up to its greater pranks while on the Romulan ships they get there right away.  Maybe it was an energy creature that jumped into the Enterprise’s computer system that then took the opportunity to trade it out for three Romulan ships when such an opportunity presented itself.

"Must really hate Captain Kirk"

The Romulans must really hate Captain Kirk.  He must have such a negative reputation in the Romulan Star Empire.  He destroyed their scout sent to judge human weakness in “Balance of Terror,” his ship for no real reason flies into the Neutral Zone bluffing his way out of capture in “The Deadly Years,” and then he does it a second time and when he is caught, he fakes his death to steal the new cloaking device in “The Enterprise Incident.”  Now he survives an ambush that should have killed him and while doing so messes up three Romulan ships.  On a side note, I am assuming the reason they didn’t take the Romulans prisoner at the end is the Enterprise crew is unsure if the infection in Romulan the computers can spread.

FINAL GRADE 5 of 5

THE ENTERPRISE MUST CHASE DOWN PIRATES TO SAVE SPOCK!

 

Episode Title:  The Pirates of Orion

Air Date: 9/7/1974

Written by Howard Weinstein

Directed by Bill Reed

Cast: William Shatner as Captain James T. Kirk    Leonard Nimoy as Commander Spock        DeForest Kelley as Dr. Leonard H. McCoy AKA “Bones”              James Doohan  as Lieutenant Commander Montgomery Scott AKA “Scotty”, Lieutenant Arex, Lieutenant Kyle, Captain O’Shea, and the Orion Captain                           George Takei as Lieutenant Hikaru Sulu and unnamed Lieutenant                    Nichelle Nichols as Lieutenant Nyota Uhura          Majel Barrett as Nurse Christine Chapel, unnamed Lieutenant, and Enterprise computer        Norm Prescott as Orion Lieutenant and Orion Ensign

Ships: USS Enterprise NCC-1701, USS Huron NCC-F1913, unnamed Orion vessel

Planets: none

My Spoiler filled summary and review: The Enterprise is on a routine diplomatic mission where they are to go to a party celebrating the opening of new Academy of Science on Deneb V.  The ship is needed to represent the Federation, because apparently the ship has nothing better to do.  It seems to me to be a case missed priorities.  The whole thing is delayed when the ship has an outbreak of choriocytosis.  Which sounds bad but really isn’t that big of deal because Dr. McCoy has it under control.  Or that is he did when it was only affecting the human members of the crew.  It appears that this thing can get real nasty when it hits a Vulcan, and it gets its grip into our most favorite Vulcan, Mr. Spock.  

Spock down for the count!

According to Dr. McCoy, Spock is dying.  He can treat it somewhat to the delay the effects but Spock has only a few days at most.  The only thing that can save the First Officer for sure is naturally-occurring strobolin.  However, the nearest batch is located four days away from the Enterprise.  The good news is their ship is part of a mighty Starfleet that has lots of ships and it would be ridiculous if they were the only ship in the sector.  So, they contact Starfleet to have them send a ship that is closer and have them rendezvous with the Enterprise.  

The USS Huron is the ship tasked with bringing the medicine to the Enterprise.  However, they are also carrying supplies of dilithium crystals for Federation ships, which makes them a prime target for space pirates.  This is exactly what happens as Orion pirates attack the poor cargo ship.  Enterprise arrives after the pirates are gone.  They aid the crew and are told that the pirates cleaned them out of everything even the medicine. 

USS Huron

Kirk is determined to find the pirates which he does fairly easily.  He then communicates with the pirates to see if they have the medicine.  When they ask what Kirk will do if they have it, the Captain informs them that they will allow the pirates to keep the dilithium they have, plus Kirk will give them some more, and they will remove any reference to the pirates in their ships logs so no one will know it was the Orions that stole them.  

Starfleet crew under attack!

Kirk’s offer is so good that the Orions feel it cannot be true. As soon as the Enterprise reports their actives here the neutrality of Orion is lost. There is only one thing to do: they must destroy the Enterprise.  They don’t fire power to outgun them but the asteroids in this belt are full of dangerous energy that could destroy both ships.  The Orions are willing to die for their secrecy.  They tell Kirk that they will accept his offer if the Captain collects the medicine in person on the asteroid below. Although Kirk expects this is some sort of trap, he has no idea that the Orions have rigged this asteroid to blow up and destroy both ships. 

Orion ship!

Kirk meets the Orion Captain on the surface and his opponent announces his intentions.  What the Orion Captain did not know is that Captain Kirk is the greatest fighter in the galaxy who fights with such speed and grace that most Orions would turn greener with envy.  However, this pirate doesn’t need to beat Kirk he just needs to press the button.  He almost does but that is when Scotty beams them both back to the Enterprise and disarms him.  Kirk tells his opponent that he is their prisoner and if his crew kills themselves now it will do them no good.  Listening to reason the Orion Captain orders his crew to surrender. Spock has been treated and is now cured.  

The meeting of Captains

Additional thoughts: Last week Spock’s Vulcan anatomy protected him from the rainbow Dramian virus and years ago it prevented the salt vampire from killing him.  Here however what in one case was an advantage is now a disadvantage.  Choriocytosis is friendly to no one but it is extra horrible to Vulcans.  It just goes to show that evolutionary advantage is very conditional.  Sometimes it is beneficial to be a Vulcan and sometimes it isn’t. 

So, what is up with the Orions being blue?  I mean it’s not too big of a deal, humans after all come in all sorts of colors. I would just prefer the Orions to be different shades of green as opposed outright different colors.  I don’t put a lot of stock into the visuals of the Animated Series as canon.  Stories yes, but visuals no.  The Tribbles were the wrong color in “More Tribbles, More Troubles,” and the deltas never point up.

Kirk taking another captain down!

Why does the Enterprise have so much spare dilithium now?  Did Starfleet wise up after the incidents in “Where No Man Has Gone Before” and “Mudd’s Women?”  I hope they have it would end the annoying “oh no, we have no more crystals” plots. 

The Enterprise finding it's fellow starship in trouble

So many time the Enterprise comes up against something that is so powerful their ship is utterly helpless.  This dates all the way back to “The Corbomite Maneuver.” It is kind of refreshing to see a group of aliens realize that they are no match for the Enterprise. They come up with a trap that might have worked if this was their show and they were given enough plot armor to survive.  However, it is not their show, they are the bad guys and they get to go to jail.

Just try it we out gun you ten to one!

This whole episode the Orions are concerned with preserving their home world’s neutrality. Maybe they should stop committing crimes against greater powers?  We first saw them pull this stuff in “Journey To Babel.”  Why do we let them get away with it just because some choose to commit suicide. The Federation is somewhat at fault here for not taking a harder line against them.  If I was the Federation President, I would point out that proof beyond reasonable doubt is court standard not the requirement of a great space power defending its interest.  I would let them know that if had good reason to think they were behind something we would treat it as an absolute certainty.  Of course, with Kirk dragging them off to jail the point is kind of mute. Speaking of the end it wasn’t very dramatic, the bad guys just tried their plan and it failed.  All is well that ends well.  

FINAL GRADE 4 of 5